Give Yourself Permission To Let Go!

I’ve been working on having some fun in my life. Nothing extravagant, just doing something little that makes me smile and feel good….but I was feeling so much guilt because my kitchen was a wreck, my floor needs vacuuming and I didn’t have any food to cook!

You know that moment when you walk around your house and see…THE MESS?! It feels overwhelming. You really want to have the energy or the motivation to tackle the cleaning. But instead, you put it off and wake up the next day only to feel the same thing again. Sound familiar?
Ask yourself: What if…?

What if I give myself permission to let it go? What if I let all those piles of things just sit there?

Well, I am giving you permission to LET IT GO! It can wait. It isn’t an immediate threat. Go have some fun, laugh and smile.

IT WILL BE OK!

What is it that you’d like to do for yourself but keep putting it off? It doesn’t have to be something expensive or overly time consuming. It can be taking a nice bath, sitting out in the back yard, taking a dance class or even just flipping through a book that has been sitting on your coffee table for months. Wouldn’t you feel better if you do the things you love? To do the things you tell yourself over and over again that you are going to do?

That’s my challenge for you this weekend. Just stop and do something to nourish YOU!

We all have those things that we love to do. When you keep saying “I’ll get to it when I have time. I’ll get to it when…” What does that feel like inside?

If you get the dishes done, do you actually do the things you’ve been wanting to do afterwards? Or does it just get swept under the rug until another day?

I get it. So many of my clients are frustrated about not feeling well. Their house is a mess and they are stuck in a loop of frustration. I give you permission to take a break and go do something that makes you smile!

When you do something your heart desires, you will feel better. Trust me.

Want to see MY mess? Watch this:

The Bedpan Story: How To Get Your Momentum Going in the Right Direction

When I was in the hospital last month, I felt scared, in pain and afraid I would never get better. The mind has a way of taking over when you’re in FEAR…it took me down the road of negative thinking.

I could not move for 3 days, and you want to know what the MOTIVATING FACTOR was to get me out of bed?

First, let me ask you…have you ever been in a position where you were so motivated to avoid something you would do absolutely anything NOT to do it?

Sometimes it’s hard to come up with a grand, altruistic reason to get out of bed. Sometimes the only reason you can muster is to escape something else. And that is OK!

In my case…I did not want to do “you know what” on the BEDPAN!  I rallied my mindset, called the nurse for another Percocet and painfully got out of bed to use the restroom. It was a victory. I was NOT GOING TO USE THAT BEDPAN! I was super motivated! And this leads me to the next lesson that got me through my time in the hospital in record speed…

When you’re in a tough situation, look for whatever motivation you can to get your momentum going in the right direction. If a situation is too scary or totally against your principles, what can you do to avoid it? What can you do to change it?

Overcoming Obstacles

I’ve been pulling back the curtain and sharing about my recent experience in the hospital for the past week now. My intention in doing this is to share the lessons I learned so they can serve you too.

Like I said before, I was completely bedridden after my fall on the 4th of July.

To make matters worse, I went to Dr. Jones, a “pain specialist” to review my MRI. He delivered some not so great news…

“You have BONE ON BONE arthritis on L5/S1, stenosis, an annular tear and two herniated discs.”

My heart SUNK. I’m only 39 years old. I have WAY more life to live!

Not only that, but I actually had a trip to Canada planned 2 weeks later.

Instead of feeling down and out and cancelling the trip, I shifted into overdrive in my mind.

I committed to my prescribed exercises and stretches and kept moving. And I am going to learn so much so that I can teach you!

I searched for resources. I found motivation wherever I could.

Most importantly, I told myself “I can overcome this” over and over again as each day passed.

I saw myself getting on that plane to Canada, and guess what? I did!

And this is the final lesson I want to share with you…

Your mind is POWERFUL, and movement (even when you’re in pain) can make a huge difference. Use it as a tool on your healing journey.

Here’s a Solution to Help When You Get Triggered

This week, something happened that left me feeling scared and stressed. A friend’s 15 year-old son was arrested, handcuffed and taken by the police to the behavioral crisis center.  I was so upset! This child had gotten out of control! His parents didn’t know how to handle him.  I tried with all my might to help him. My heart was broken and I just felt awful! I couldn’t shake it!

The whole event triggered something deep and painful inside me. It brought up some childhood wounds and I was just anxious all week.

The child didn’t need to be sent off to a bootcamp, he needed parents who made him their #1 priority! He was raising himself, alone in the world and acting out to get attention and love.  He just needed love and support.

I admit, initially I was angry at the child and blaming him for being a troublemaker. Then I stopped.  I had to check in with myself.  My ADULT SELF was hurting.  Stressed and anxious! Then, I got in touch with my inner 15 year-old and imagined her sitting next to this boy who’s struggling. What I saw was a boy who is scared, a boy who needs love, to be nurtured and to be supported unconditionally.  As a teenager, I needed that too.

I had to grow up fast and good thing I chose the “right” path. I worked hard in school, got straight As and put myself through college…all by myself. To this day, I struggle finding my inner parent to help me feel secure and calm my anxious nervous system. Does this sound familiar to you?

Situations in our life can really trigger deep pains inside of us…pains we might not have even uncovered yet! These emotional pains are held deep within us as we carry on with our day! My heart was  literally hurting.

Can you think of an event in your life, involving others that overwhelmed you and tugged deep at your emotional heartstrings? A situation that made your body clench and you had so much emotion over it that it basically paralyzed you?

Here’s a solution to help when you get triggered:

•Stop! Breathe. Take a moment to go within.

•Check in with YOU and see if there is a past moment in your life that mimicked or relates to the event that has your paralyzed.

•Were you were a certain age? How were you feeling? Maybe your parents weren’t able to support you and nurture you.

•Take that event, imagine you had two absolutely loving parents there to support you, who took care of you. How would that situation in your life been different if you had the love and support?

•Feel that in your body! Imagine having all the loving support and care you needed.

•Feel a sense of safety in every cell of your body.

If you’re in pain, imagine having three individuals to guide you. One is a COMFORTER, a PROTECTOR and a WISE ONE.  Imagine these three helpers with you. Let them guide you and love you through the painful time.

Try it! I feel so much relief today and I’m super motivated, looking forward to my day! My anxiety went bye-bye!

If this resonated with you today, reply to this email phaedra@paintreatmentsthatwork.com.  I’d love to hear from you.